“Hello?”

“Hello, Mr. Paul Thorn? This is Naomi from the Red Cross calling. Are you free to talk?”

“Well…I am a little busy. Things to do. You know how it is.”

“I’m sorry sir, but we noted that it has been over six months since your last donation. As a member of the public with an O-negative blood type, your donations are extremely helpful to people in need. Are you aware that O-negative is what we call the universal blood type?”

“Yes…I had heard…”

“Then you can understand how vital it is in this time of shortages that we schedule a time for you to visit your local Red Cross to donate. Can we schedule a time for you right now?”

“Actually…I’ve been meaning to call you. We need to talk about my donations.”

“Yes sir? Is there a problem?”

“I hope not. The truth is…I’m going to need them back.”

Pause.

“Are you still there?”

“Ah…yes, Mr. Thorn. Did you say you need your donations…back?”

“Yes. May I schedule a time to pick up the eight pints I have donated in the past six years? I’m going to need them.”

“Sir…I’m afraid that’s not how this works…”

“I understand, but you see, something bad is coming, and I’m going to need that blood. As you say, since I am the Universal blood type, that makes my blood extremely useful for certain things. I’ll come by this afternoon.”

“Mr. Thorn…we cannot give you…”

“Look…I know this is awkward, but look at it this way, this is not as awkward as my next call.”

A pause, then a sigh. “Ok. I’ll bite. Where are you calling next?”

“The sperm bank.” Click

Thorn sighed and tossed the smartphone into the trash. He grabbed his keys and his hunting rifle and walked out the door.

Categories: story

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